A little more than bulging belly

Pregnancy is a little more complicated than what i thought to be just the bulging belly itself. It's all about knowledge and learning human biology all over again. Well, not exactly. Some things are just not in the books. Schools won't teach you how to do A to get B and do C to get to D. You have to learn it by hard.

Schools teach you about XX chromosome for a girl and XY for a boy but they never teach you sperms of X-chromosome are bigger in size, swim slower, carry food on them for "camping" and of course, live longer than those of Y-chromosomes. And not to mention that due to the various characteristics of X-chromosome sperms, you wanna have girls, you gotta xxx like 6-5 days (back count) prior AND stop whatever you enjoyed 3-2 days before and on the ovulation day. Well, why stop since it maximizes the chance of scoring a goal? I've said, if you want a girl, you should do something like above.

Y-chromosome sperms appear slimmer, swim faster and die off quicker as they can't be bother to carry food on them. So, if you continue xxx for the rest of the days until ovulation day, you'll max the chance for the Y-sperms to reach the goal faster instead of allowing the X-sperms to do that. Poor them! They've been camping for days....

If you don't mind having either a boy/girl, then do however and whatever you want from after menstrual til ovulation and stop right there since anything after ovulation is no more fertile.

Now, if you would like boys, of course, as much xxx 3-2 days before and on ovulation day itself and hopefully they can find their right way. Again, only one side of the ovaries is at work each month so if the swimmers get in the wrong entrance then bless them.

Above are only some guidelines i learnt by hard via Internet and i don't bear any responsibilities upon any failures (credit me the success if you've seen this and did what i told ya and yay~you're pregnant). Please also be advised that even if you have done all the above and still don't see the result, the cold hard fact is that, there's only 25% chance of conceiving each month for doing everything correctly.

Another fact is, sometimes the more u depend on those ovulation kits, Basal Body Temperature-taking and charting and etc, the less chance you might get to conceive. Maybe it's the stress factor. The more stress u put on yourself and yr partner, the more it might not be a success. Mine? I threw those away 1-2 months ago and later, i'm having a small bulging belly. Believe it or not.

After some facts on the sperms, let's look at the ovary.

Image taken from http://www.medicalook.com

Those (many) round follicles, you actually get them from your mother since the day you were formed as a fetus inside your mummy's womb. Those follicles are being released every month to assist with your ovulation (some months you don't get ovulation even though you're perfectly healthy and menstrual still arrives like every other months). You will see all the round follicles as some deep black holes on computer scan. The "holes" vary in sizes. Holes with bigger size means they're almost ready to rupture and follicle in it to be released for ovulation in the next few months. The number of holes and follicles DO NOT increase in numbers as you grow older but in fact, they decrease in numbers. That, explains the proved fact that older women (>35) are less fertile as the follicles have been decreasing for the past 30+ earlier years and they're left with not many in the ovaries. It makes conceiving a little more less chance and harder than younger age women. To me, it's a very scary fact to come to know this. Just to think that one day, my ovaries will not have any of the fertile follicle left makes me go @_@"

So, if you're healthy, got a steady ongoing partner to spend the life with, not against marriage, not having that thought "i should enjoy while i'm still young", not against babies, not against the idea of having the responsibility of taking care of a family, then i don't see why you're not into the idea of getting married a little younger and get started a little younger. And no offense to anyone here. Everyone enjoys different lives. So enjoy yours.

幸福婚姻的8堂课

结了婚才觉得自己孤单...? 那是结婚好还是不结婚好呢?

其实“大多数夫妻是为了错误的理由而结婚”。你一脚踩进婚姻漫长的旅途了吗? 你还是有希望的，只要做点改变，夫妻关系就可以起死回生。

1。驯服自己就能驯夫
为什么婚姻令人觉得孤单呢? 治疗专家认为。多半是因为期待落空的关系。
原本以为伴侶能够满足我们的需求，却没想到只要是向外的需求，都无法令人满足。
其实驯夫应该从“驯服自己”开始。
“我们都为了埋藏在自己内心的问题而惩罚别人。”
事实上，每个人都带着原生家庭的伤口长大的，每个人多少都有些缺憾。
了解创伤的根源，才能达到疗愈的功效。

2。放下对对方的期待
你我都知道人不是十全十美的。你能做到的事不代表别人相同能够做得到。何苦勉强／教你的伴侶如何来爱你呢? 为何不用心来体会他／她对你的爱呢? 那会是一种不同的享受。
只有不断的学习着接受和放下，才能放下对对方的期待。

3。你想得到的，你先给
“你跟对方要什么礼物，就是你要先给出的礼物。”
希望对方给你什么，不妨先给对方，慢慢就会有所转变。
人有种“你愈要我怎样，我偏不怎样”的劣根性。
愈想改变对方，反而愈不容易达成目标。
只要你不再强求，放开你的手，对方感觉如释重负，就比较有兴趣来取悦你。

4。发自内心赞美对方
人是最感性的动物，所以人会感受得到一个人的赞美是真心的或者是假意的。
发自内心的赞美应该是最容易的，如果你是真的爱你的伴侶。
不需刻意或伪装的想要从对方身上得到什么的赞美才是最真实，最贴心的。

5。真正的爱，不会伤痛
最重要的是，女性千万不可陷入牺牲和角色扮演中。
爱是自然的流露，自然的“给”，牺牲的人拼命的付出，却没有空间接受，久了也会筋疲力尽的。
不少人被生活中 “做妻子的应该怎么做，不该做什么，该怎么做 或者做丈夫的应该帮忙包办什么家务事” 的事压得喘不过气，觉得只有自己一个人在付出却没有得到任何回报，频问：“为什么只有我变，对方永远不用改变?”
切记，如果你的改变只是想换来对方的改变，那就会永远没有改变了。
当女人懂得放手后，变得轻松愉快，也让男人知道该怎么做。
不妨给于一些爱的鼓励：“你为我做这些我觉得好幸福。”
万物起头难啊～但还是要继续不断的去做：“任何人都可以用爱灌溉。”

6。再次承诺的魔力
男人最怕，女人最爱！
这也是牵扯到男人与女人的构造的不相同。
男人；直接，用脑和理性来思考，不喜欢重复和做多余的谈话／事情
女人：拐弯抹角，用“心”和感性来思考，喜欢重复和做多余的谈话／事情
简单来说，简直就是两个世界的人，不应该放置在一起。
但是，人的一生，难道那每一天区区的1秒种“再次的承诺”都算是多余的吗?

7。放下尊严，彼此尊敬
女人没男人是不行的。男人没女人也是不成的。（这句话一向来都引起许多纠纷和话题）
不说肉体，其实人要的是那一种心灵上的依靠。互相依靠。
所谓的男女平等，其实根本不存在。请查阅第3点。
“你愈觉得女人一定要靠男人才行，我就愈不靠 ／ 你愈觉得男人一定要靠女人才行，我就愈不靠”。
偏偏，女人往往会发出这样的信息因为在古时，女人是被视为弱者，被踩在男人的脚下。随着时代的改变，女人就誓死要比男人强。
这是社会风气所捏造出来的女人，所以就怪不得女人有这样的概念。
但是，如果你想维持美好的情侶或夫妻关系，无论男女都要放开这伤感情的概念。
在你所爱的人的眼里，你不需要这样辛苦把你的尊严高高褂。

8。复习心动的初衷
忘记了那初次的心动了吗?
碰到令你喜欢的对象，不要发展成外遇，而是应该在心里感谢这个人提醒了你， 你最初对你伴侶的心动，并选择再次跟伴侶承诺，这些他人身上的魅力也会巧妙的转移到伴侶身上。
除非你想出轨，不然你不会让你的心和身体这么做。

No more wait

2 weeks are just too long for a wait, dont you think so?? Agree? Yeah...

So regardless of my appointment date on 18th March, I popped in the gynae's clinic this morning with husband. We are 3 days early but after a week plus had gone by, something should be able to be seen i think. Thick faced, i registered my name down and almost immediately before i managed to find a seat, the nurse asked me into the room while husband was still looking for car spot.

A senior nurse led me to another room and sat me down. She searched for my file and opened it and asked me what i was there for today. I rolled my eyes a bit and told her i wanted to ask doc about the safety issue of some direct sales vitamins and ALSO, to do a scan if possible. She looked away a while and told me that i might not need to do the scan since i've done it last time. But, she didn't know nothing could be seen in the sac last time. Duh! I want the scan today. I must see something on the screen. Get me laid down on the bed. Do the test. I'll pay the money. *Dont you know pregnant women are aggressive?*

Without further ado, she took me to the bed and i waited for the doc to scan me. My husband joined the team shortly. This time i saw the sac grew much bigger and within the sac there's another little sac. In medical term, i dont know what it's named but the fetus is inside the little sac in the big sac. Very blur. Couldn't see much. I was very anxious at that point where i couldn't see much again. Husband got anxious altogether. Laughingly, the gynae tried to calm the couples down by using the cross hair to point to a little "flashing" dot in the little sac. THERE IT IS! MY BABY!!!!The tiny little heart is beating like nobody's business! T___T Almost want to burst into tears la! Anxiety+anticipation+amazement+cuteness overloaded = holding back tears (at least wait til i get home first). The heart is already functioning at this point of time even though it is still very weak. Too tiny to be seen vividly, it just looks like some flashing LED light if you turn it on and off. Beating ma! ^_^ I'm so proud of you my little one! Keep on fighting for life and our God will be guiding your way! No fear!

z z z Z Z Z

I just can't get myself to do anything. I sleep all day. I feel so not myself. I've been attacked by alien hormones. My body is overtaken by the hormones! I could imagine they're setting up a control room somewhere in the body and taking control over my internal organs and messing up the systems T_T. I feel like crying for no reason. I feel the anger for no reason as well. I feel so hungry all the time. After eating, i still eat. I eat. I sleep. Then wake up to eat some more. Then sleep some more. Then i eat some more for high-T. Then nap. Then get ready for dinner. Then wander around a bit then get ready for good night sleep. Arghh~~~~
I feel so "bear"/"pig".

I rarely go out since the gynae-visit day. Hubby worries that i might move too much so i stay at home hibernating all the time. For two weeks, I went to office for 3 times (flexible job). Lucky me huh.

Despite all the groanings, I know i should be giving thanks. So far, i haven't experience much of those so called morning sickness. Sometimes i do feel very nauseated but not to the extend of vomiting my lungs out. If the condition continues so, i should be one of those lucky ones not having severe morning sickness.

Each day seems like life-long for me. I wait for time to go by. I feed the fishes. Sitting beside the pond, staring at them to finish eating. Then throw some more fish food. They're gonna be so bloated by the end of the day and so fat by the end of my pregnancy term. I hope they're some happy fishes to be fed with so much food.

1st addition

Finally, after a year's of wait and anticipation, here it comes surprising us. The timing is so right in God's hands. After i quit the teacher's job. After we had our 1st year anniversary honeymoon. After the hectic Chinese New Year schedules and celebrations and not to mention of the much drinkings involved. It arrives on time and it's to be expected to come to the world early Nov 2008. Just in time to catch the "rat tail" yes? I'm not those superstitious kind of person but I'm a Chinese so immediately those Chinese horoscopes flash thru my mind. Odd Chinese odd! Anyway, as long as the baby is healthy, all the others are nothing.

Looking back my previous post on 25th Feb, no wonder i hibernated A LOT! It was all due to hormonal changes in me. I sensed something wasn't right and with a long due menstrual, it triggered my suspicion for some pee sticks-testings. Never those pee sticks turned out to be so valuable and appealing in front of my eyes (and hubby's). We were all confirmed that i need some gynae-visit immediately the next day.

It wasn't long before my turn to be called into the room and straight ahead they laid me on the bed waiting for the gynae to ultrasound scan me. To our delight, a yolk sac was found. Tiny but visible to the machine. At the stage of 5w2d, everything was still too early to be seen. We saw nothing in the sac. Not even a dot. Nothing. This sunk my heart a little. But our gynae reassured us that a baby will be seen in there shortly (after 2 weeks wait) and that 2 weeks seemed like eternal for me.

Joy overflowed. Good news spread and we could wait no longer! Fine. We're a bit big mouth but we couldn't care less. We understand that since God provides, He will take care of the young one. With that faith, we broke the news to close friends, close relatives and of coz both sides parents and siblings were the first to know.

And I come to realise that a fact when someone is pregnant, every single individual besides her (no matter he/she is married or single or young or old or experienced or non-experienced) all becomes expert in pregnancy stuffs all of sudden. You'll get advises from head to heel of what to do/not to do or what to eat/not to eat or what to stay away from etc. Sometimes, it can be a bit overwhelming and of course, i appreciate every bits of them as they're all of good intention, aren't they?

So for the mean time, more hibernations are needed!